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The Seas We Fear to Sail

by Evan Sponseller

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1.
Good God, if Your song leaves our lips If Your work leaves our hands Then we will be wonderers and vagabonds They will stare and say how empty we are How the freedom we had turned us up as dead men Let us be cold, make us weak Let us, because we all have ears Let us, because we all have eyes Good God How they knew that this would happen We're so run down Good God, can you still get us home? How can we still get home? We're forgetting our forgiveness
2.
I'll lay me down tonight Much further down Swim in the calm tonight This art does drown What follows me as the whitest lace of light Will swallow whole just begs to be imbrued What follows has led me to this place where I belong, With all erased All insects sing tonight The coldest sound I'd send God's grace tonight Could it be found I'll lay me down tonight Much further down Watch stars go out tonight On sinking ground
3.
So strange I remember you in protest of a prayer Falling back from seas we fear to sail I swear I saw the shooter, gold teeth and a double dare, Postmodern warnings seem inclined to fail. Feigning an apology. Those words they never left your lips. Those 5 years in Bermuda slide by like the lights of passing ships, So strange I remember you, knee-deep in Nietzsche's lies my throat was an open grave I drank your stained glass eyes They taste like dead cathedrals that are crumbling beneath the weight of ten thousand jaded tourists who've traded in their hearts and hands for disposable cameras, set to document to decay, set to capture just enough of life to catalogue the things we throw away. Breathing the fumes of our machines We've lost our way. Breathing through television dreams If we could only see us now. The words of the dead ring in our ears, but its only a lie. The voice in your head brings you to tears, but you don't know why. The words of the dead ring in our ears, but its only a lie. The voice in your head brings you to tears,but its only a lie, Its only a lie, ...isn't it?
4.
Can we last through the winter? The water's starting to freeze. The only one who remembers Taking the wrong step, falling in front of me. This body's already aging. These nights are all ready long. And if I last through the winter, I swear to you now, I won't call. Congratulations, go home now. Will we last through the winter? Will we make it to see? I never wanted a partner I never loved you, now you are free to leave. This heart is already frozen, I can't remember the fall. And if I last through the winter, I swear to you now, I won't call. Congratulations, go home now. It's too late, it's too late, they won't let go. Follow five footsteps through that open door, open door. It must be buried under the heart That makes this pace consistent. You'll find it torn, that gate's been opened? I've been wondering if you've been real with us. It's start, stop and go you've been dying for, you've been dying for.
5.
Sorrow 04:17
Father can you hear me? How have I let you down? I curse the day that I was born And all the sorrow in this world Let me take you to the herding ground Where all good men are trampled down Just to settle a bet that could not be won Between a prideful father and his son Will you guide me now, for I can't see A reason for the suffering and this long misery What if every living soul could be upright and strong Well, then I do imagine There will be sorrow no more When all soldiers lay there weapons down Or when all kings and all queens relinquish their crowns Or when the only true messiah rescues us from ourselves It's easy to imagine There will be sorrow no more

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released October 20, 2017

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Evan Sponseller Ventura, California

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